Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Games parents play

"Dad, can you change my name when I am a little older?" As I took my eyes off the road and looked at the rear view mirror, I could see my son's eyes squint a little in an effort to hide his embarrassment. He was sitting in the rear seat and he shrugged soon after he finished up his question. We had named our son Jacob (after my dad) and it was an anglicized name - I have heard of other Indian kids complain about their names sounding too Indian and hard to pronounce, but Jacob - no, that is not a name to complain about. I laid my eyes on the road again for a bit and then turned back and asked - "Why do you want to change your name, Jacob?". "I don't know", came the reply - " just because."
Soon, I was at a traffic light that turned red - so I stepped on the brake, turned around and continued my conversation. "There must be some reason- If it is a valid one, we can think of changing your name", I said. I knew in my heart that it was a lie, but a dad's gotta do what he has to do to get his son spill the beans on what is really going on.

"Well, a kid in my class calls me Jacobi to make it sound like I am a small kid". I could sense the sadness in his voice. "And I don't want to be a small kid". "Hmm.." I thought to myself - "If what I said earlier were true, this would be a good reason to change his name - since his feelings got hurt."
"Well Jacob, you have to tell him that it Jacobi is not your name and that you don't like being called that name."
"I told him that - like two hundred times; but he said he doesn't care and calls me Jacobi anyway." At that point I knew that he had really tried hard to resolve the situation - because two hundred is his largest number - anything unimaginably huge is two hundred for him.
"Oh..OK", I mumbled, which was my place holder response in lieu of a clear answer or resolution.

I had to turn my attention to the road again as the car behind me started honking. By the way, is it just me or does the red light always change to green when you really want it to stay red for a bit longer? Sorry, back to the point of discussion.

I started thinking about how this muddy situation could be cleared. "What is the name of the that kid?" I asked. "Mark (name changed)" came the reply.
I gave it more thought. "Ok, heres what you do Jacob - Call him markee and say that he looks like a small kid and sounds like one too. If he gets angry, let him know that you will stop once he stops calling you Jacobi and that's how the deal works. Got it?"
"YES! - that is a good idea!" I could see the appreciation and happiness that glittered in his eyes. He was happy that his dad had helped him solve a problem that was nagging him for a couple of days. After all, it was only the third day of school this year.
And then I thought some more. "What if Mark does not get annoyed? What if Mark's dad counters this with another strategy? This is getting interesting. I don't even know Mark's dad, but I am eagerly awaiting his next move. Wow, this is like playing a strategy game without spending the money to buy it. What if this is wrong? Shouldn't I be telling him to lay low and be diplomatic whenever he can? Wait, the real world is not going to be soft and politically correct and diplomatic all the time, so this could be an early training package for him - on how real life is going to be. Besides, he tried the diplomatic route already."

That night, he gave me the privilege of reading him a book. Usually that spot was reserved for my wife. I was elated that he had already found a friend in me. "Yes, this is a team game", I thought to myself. "Bring it on; Mark's dad! Put your game face on! May the parent with the best wits win."

3 comments:

Nona said...

Let's know what Mark's dad comes up with.

UL said...

Yes I agree, now I am curious on what the other parent came up with...chuckling too...nice to see you back, heard that you were in Kerala from the previous post, extremely jealous - :)...btw how old is Jacob? My daughter adds an i or y to anything and everything - looks like the rest of her friends do too..sometimes it is annoying, sometime funny, yesterday she was saying "spoony" - all the time!

Scribbler said...

@Nona - Sorry to say - the strategy worked. Now I will have to ask Jacob to find a kid with a dad who is more confrontational :)

@UL :) Thanks. Jacob will be 6 this december. Yes, kids do some of the interesting things - that change our life flavor from "Vanilla" to "Rocky Road"