My annoyance list for the year end

Its not surprising that when the year is winding down to a close, you spot lists at all possible places - best people, worst people, best cars, worst news stories - you get the point. I think the reason they are popular is because its an articulate way of asking "Do you remember this time when..?" and we go - "oooooh yeah I remember!"

To avoid falling off the bandwagon, I thought I would compile a list of my own - no , they are not best or worsts, but just annoyances that one has to deal with while treading the natural terrains of life. And they are year, age and gender agnostic. So here goes...

• Friends calling up asking for a recommendation and then turning the tables on you. The story begins when they call up asking your recommendation on something they want to buy (like a DVD player, TV or something similar). So you start with what you own and why you bought it and then go on to explain why you like it. That is when they turn all "Simon" on you. Barrage of questions follow - "Did you know it had this fault?", "On the product web page, I read so many bad reviews - Did you read those"?, "How come you paid so much for that? I did some research and found out that you can get it for much less". My mental response - "Well buddy, some of us just want to get the stuff we want instead of wasting time ridiculing your friends about their choices.". My actual response - "Yeah I guess I did not do enough research, looks like you are an expert on this" and ending the conversation to the sound of their victory smirk.
• Grownups who mimic baby talk when talking to babies. Imagine this - You had a bad fall and broke a leg. After physiotherapy, you are slowly trying to walk in a normal fashion - and everyone in your house limps and imitates your walk thinking they can communicate better. Yeah - that.would.be.TERRIBLE. I am no pediatrician or child expert, but I think what is going on in the baby's mind is this - "Come on, can you give me a break here? I get it, my speech is not as perfect as yours, but you don't have to make those funny lip movements and tongue twists to talk to me- Maybe you haven't noticed, my ears are just fine!"
• Car owners who register their cars as "my {Insert premium car name here}". OK, so you had the guts or the money to get a brand name car. But that doesn't make the rest of us any less owners of our cars. I imagine you don't have a big "My House" in front of your house or your spouse does not have "My spouse" tattooed on her forehead - so why make an exception for the car?
• Folks who act surprised when you get a new piece of information. "Oh you did not know that?", they say, with their eyebrows up to their hairline. "It's been that way since way back when.." and the surprise morphs into contempt and sympathy for your lack of upkeep in worldly events. Where is the empathy for the busy lives of others? If I could express my opinion (well, I will - last time I checked, this was still MY Blog - refer previous bullet point :-)), let me say this - "Look, I don't know what kind of purposeless life you live, but, I have to pay attention to my job, life and family, so a little delay in getting irrelevant information can't hurt me that much."
• White bath appliances. Who ever came up with the idea? Every little dust particle, every speck of calcium eventually translates into hours of cleaning to be done by us mere mortals. Plus, if it were a darker color, I could see all the gray hair falling off instead of worrying about hair loss. At this age, I am sure small reassurances like that could calm me down a bit now and then.
  
• God complex owners who use their middle finger on every occasion. Just because it is attached to your body and you can lift it up without added effort, does not make the gesture more socially acceptable. (Guys, get the analogy I am trying to make here?) Of course, we could retaliate by mirroring it, but that would defeat the purpose - like waging a war to achieve peace.
• Finally, blog posts like these that spew anger and annoyance. I see them propping up more and more on the web nowadays - as more surfers venture into the ocean of blogs and the Internet. There is so much love to pass around in the world, why would you want to crib about things that cause displeasure just to you? Ain't that pigeonholing?

Joy and Peace to the World!

Of slums, dogs and millionaires

Last night, I got to watch "Slumdog Millionaire" at the local cinema. I know many of my readers are anxiously waiting to see it and want to know how it is. So here goes, my first attempt at reviewing a movie.

If I were to sum up "Slumdog Millionaire" in 3 words, those words would be "feel good movie". Director Danny Boyle(famous for directing Trainspotting, Millions and 28 days later) has blended life, liberty and the pursuit of love of an impoverished Mumbai slum dweller into a carefully crafted "rags to riches" narrative. The movie starts with Jamal(referred to as "Slumdog" in the movie mutliple times) being just one question away from winning 20 million rupees in a game show. The audience is then asked the question - how did he get here? "Slumdog" then takes the audience through an amazing journey of Jamal's life until that point in time; simultaneously answering the question that was asked in the opening sequence.

The director has successfully taken a book (Q & A by Vikas Swarup) that was intended for an Indian audience and transformed it into a piece of cinema that can be enjoyed globally. The storyline blends reality, destiny, comedy(intermittent) and miracle, so there are some parts where you may find it a little cheesy. I think the movie is at its best when the main characters are going through their childhood phase. The child actors are superb, to say the least, and add a lot of substance to the soul of the movie. It is when they grow up (now played by different actors) that they change their language to English (earlier parts of the movie feature Hindi dialogues with English subtitles) at which point the movie loses a bit of authenticity since the actors clearly are trying to put on an Indian accent. (Grown up Jamal is played by Dev Patel, who was born and raised in the UK).

The high points of the movie are its direction, cinematography and music (A. R. Rahman - who needs no introduction). Story narration is outstanding, and coupled with intertwining multiple timelines, lets the audience figure out obvious missing clues of the story instead of being spoon fed. The cinematography is par excellence- panoramic, aerial and closeup shots combine to create a wonderful palette of imagery giving a real sense of how you would see the world when you live on the streets of Mumbai. One of the highlights of the movie is a chase scene through a slum - as the camera moves, it captures all vital elements of a slum - poverty, diversity and irony ( a Benz car passing through the slum). The panoramic shot of a row of slum loos could be easily mistaken for personalized spa rooms at a jungle resort.

And then, there is the music. That is what keeps you engaged throughout the entire movie. When the situation is a nail biter, the music takes your brain out of the seat and into the actual location. It has combined elements of Indian and western instruments and embodies the mood of the movie at all times. Kudos to Rahman for a job well done.

In the acting department, both Anil Kapoor(host of the game shaow) and Irfan Khan(cop who questions Jamal) have done a great job. As I mentioned before, the child artists are a feast to the eyes. Danny Boyle has proved that he can direct kids very well (Millions) and in this movie he does it again. Dev Patel (as Jamal) has done justice to the central character. Mahesh Manjrekar (acclaimed director of Vaastav who plays Jaaved the Don in this movie) deserves a special mention. The rest of the cast do just enough acting so that the movie does not fall flat on character portrayal.

To sum it up, "Slumdog" is definitely worth a watch in the cinema. Let me warn you, if you are softhearted, there are some parts that may make you squirm - but not too much that I would advise you to stay away from it. The movie manages to stay out of making political commentary or social statements, so a lot of stuff that is happening on screen only manage to slightly bruise your conscience.

Are you still reading the review? Go, watch the movie and if possible, let me know what you think of it.

Are we protecting our kids too much?

Last week, I was discussing politics with one of my friends over the phone when suddenly my son ran up to me and said "Dad you said a bad word!". I paused for a bit, taking time to replay my conversation on the phone for the last couple of minutes. Nothing seemed to come up in the "Not allowed while kids around" list. I turned to him and asked - which word? I still had a guilty look on my face - my conversation was about politics; and politicians usually can only be described in words that would not be uttered in a PG-13 movie. "You said 'stupid', dad" my son said with a wide smile which I am sure was the product of the role reversal that just happened - he caught ME doing something bad. At this point, I felt I was under a two pronged emotional attack - I was being falsely accused; and my son was being shielded from the words that are as common as - well, the common cold. "What? Stupid is a bad word?" - No, that was not me, it was my friend on the other end of the phone. On realizing he was still on the phone, I hastily said bye to him and hung up. I then went on to convince my son that "stupid" was not a bad word; its only when you call someone stupid that it takes on the bad meaning. To illustrate it further, I said the rule that had been put forth by the teacher was stupid, but calling the teacher stupid for putting out that rule would be plain wrong.

And now on to my deeper thoughts on the incident (which of course, led to the origin of this post).

Of course, everyone has their own acceptable level of what falls into the good and bad category which I think, is a result of a recipe that has equal parts of personal values, culture, religion and upbringing. But how much should we shield our children to the harsh realities of the world? I think we are speedily embracing a culture of over protecting our kids. 'Stupid' and 'dumb' are bad words, even news about small acts of barbarism are preceded with a caution - "may not be suitable for young children". I am not advocating that you should take your kids to a Quentin Tarantino movie to teach them about human brutality, but come on, when did "Tom and Jerry" become too violent and graphic for children just because a cat is shredding a mouse into pieces?

Kids in the so called "developed societies" are taught that everybody wins every time. Junior Baseball has been replaced by tee ball where everybody gets a shot and nobody loses. Ratings for reading aptitude have been replaced by fast, faster and fastest so that even the slowest reader is reading "fast". Calculators are being introduced in classes as early as the second grade so that the kids don't sweat out basic arithmetic. When we were planning games for my son's birthday, the overwhelming piece of advice we got was "Make sure there are no winners and losers". Is that the right message that is supposed to prepare them for an ultra competitive world out there? In a true global economy can our kids compete with kids all around the world where they are raised in tougher neighborhoods and have more exposure to the world as is instead of the polished and sugar coated version that is more kid-friendly? I mean, who are we kidding here?

So I say this - (Though I have no credentials in good child upbringing nor am I trained in doing so)
* Lay off that hand sanitizer which you use to wipe their hands every time they touch something you think is dirty; teach them rules of personal hygiene and let them decide on what they can or cannot touch.
* Get rid of games where everybody wins every time; teach them that a gracious loser is as honorable as the winner; point out their mistakes so they can correct it and become a winner the next time around.
* Let them play in the mud and touch things that they find interesting(As long as they are not in the hazardous materials list). Feed their curiosity about the unknown and when they are done, make sure they understand what they should do to get cleaned up. Remember all those good times when you were playing out in the elements of nature and having loads of fun because your parents had not seen all the ads about bacteria, dust mites, hand sanitizers and disinfecting wipes?
* Make them aware of evil elements in the world, let them know that there are good actions and bad actions that happen in the world and in baby steps, expose them to cruel acts that happen to their fellow human beings around the world. After all, if they cannot identify evil, how will they stay away from it or take steps so that they are not a part of it?
* Let them know they are privileged and lucky to have a life where most of their basic needs are met ( I am sure that wont be convincing for them because they always feel you don't get anything they want at the supermarket :-)) and that you are privileged and lucky to have them.

Lets not shape our kids into delicate flowers that can whither away in the slightest of winds or droop down under the morning sunlight. Lets try to make them tougher than us so that they can fight the strongest tempests of the new "truly global" world and come out victorious.

Oh that reminds me, I have to rush for an appointment at school - Discussion with my son's teacher on why I am being a "bad" parent and breaking rules set by the teacher. I have to say, I am NOT looking forward to that meeting. Ciao!