If you can't beat 'em, acquire 'em

As Goliath was carrying on his "business as usual" in the valley, he saw David and his small team of supporters coming up in the horizon. David had his game face on and had the famous 'slingshot' armed. They gazed furiously at each other, replaying their attack plans in their heads and calming their nerves in preparation for the forthcoming confrontation.

***

As I settled in my seat at the office, I sensed a tickle in my brain. It was my instinct telling me that something wasn't right. There was a bag of bagels left at our project room table (Almost always, they are left overs from a failed attempt of the executives to please clients). Turns out, it was just a start - then came three visits from three top people in our company - all beginning with the same question; "How are you guys doing?". They were all dressed to impress and some of them had flown cross country to be here. That did it - I was now 'officially' freaked out.

***

As Goliath was about to scream and run at his opponent, a wise man grabbed his hand and said to him - "I would like to have a word with you". David watched carefully as Goliath leaned down and patiently listened to the wise man. As if he had gained some wisdom of his own, Goliath nodded his head in agreement and a smile dawned on his face.

***

The next day at the office was just as confusing - there were unforeseen preparations for our all hands meeting. Our accountant came by and said - "Guys, I have been to hell and back". She did not look too happy, so I had to assume that her trip to hell did not go well. Then it was deja vu - executives came by asking "How are you guys doing?" Email threads went out asking for suggestions for the food at the all hands meeting. (To be honest, I think the name "All Hands Meeting" is derived from "All the Hands" gulping down free food. Seriously, that is the only part were all hands are involved.) One of my colleagues suggested Kabobs and that stuck. Towards noon(the all hands meeting was scheduled to happen at noon), tensions were rising and I did not know what was my number one priority - feeding my hunger or quenching my thirst for definitive answers.

***

Goliath collected his thoughts for a while and then talked to a couple more people in his army. All shook their heads in agreement and then Goliath slowly walked towards David. David stood his ground, never doubting his strength for a moment, still aiming his slingshot at Goliath. David's supporters were not as strong as David - their knees shivered and heads drooped down as they waited for the inevitable arrival of Goliath.

***

At the all hands meeting, we were finally informed of what had been brewing. Our company had been acquired. Another company of giant proportions was "excited" about our products and thought we were all "experts" at what we did - so they bought us. Fate always finds ways to amuse itself. As we were eating the kabobs, we were also told that there was one casualty in the process - my colleague who had suggested kabobs for lunch. As a good gesture, he was invited back to have the kabobs( I suspect guilt had something to do with it). It was then that I saw the perfect mating of socialism and capitalism - the 'corporation' and the 'person' understanding the forces at work behind all this (one doing a much better job than the other. No prices for guessing the right answer though). We all came back to our offices dazed and confused even though the corporate textbook on how to be a successful human being says "A stable job and a big company are must ingredients for happiness". History has the advantage of hindsight, so I guess I will have to judge the textbook in the future.

***

David was taken aback when Goliath hugged him and shouted - "Congratulations!" He then shook David's hand and continued - "We are one team now. We tried to build the slingshot and failed, so let us work together to make your slingshot better." David was confused since he did not know whether he had beaten his enemy or his enemy had beaten him. All of his "go to men" were cheering and so were Goliaths'; so he figured it must be a win-win situation. When his moment of confusion passed, he suddenly realized that he no longer had his slingshot. Goliath's supporters had taken it and were already discussing plans to make it meaner, more appealing to the masses and how to retrofit it to their armoury specifications.

***

With smarter corporations and the ever blurring definition of "success", it is time to rewrite the most popular underdog story of our times.

My friends, it has been a pleasure to present to you, David Vs. Goliath 2.0.